it all started when i ticked that tiny box labeled 25-30, under the category AGE.
mid-20’s. then there’s late 20’s. then.. it’s all downhill from there.
i should’ve seen the signs.
there was me setting foot in an unfamiliar territory commonly known as the gym.
then there’s me depriving myself of carbs.
and lastly, me being the safe playing, ergo boring home buddy that i’ve become.
this wouldn’t have happened if i haven’t reached my mid-20’s.
i would’ve still been eating five cups of rice with sisig for lunch and not feeling guilty. i would’ve still been bragging to my friends that i never go to the gym and still manage to look fit. i would’ve still been feisty and ballsy on every adventure that comes my way and do things for the heck of it.
but we all need to age. it’s non-negotiable.
and frankly, im not afraid of aging. it takes more than wrinkles and menopause to scare me.
what scares me is the fact that i am getting older and i may not have a clue that i actually am.
older and wiser. it always come as one. but what if we’re just getting older but not the latter?
well it depends on how we define wiser. if wiser means playing it safe for the rest of your life and seeing things in black and white, then id rather be blissfully dumb. because life is never safe, it’s all about risks. and things are seen better in different shades and not just black and white.
i choose to live my life the way i want it, and not because it’s the norm of the society. i choose not to live my life just because it’s whats supposed to be. like i choose not to be married like the rest of the girls have been dreaming of. not because i think ill never meet the man i want to spend the rest of my life with. but because i know ill meet him (or might have already) but will never trust the sanctity of commitment. i choose not to have kids when everyone says it’s what makes a woman whole. because i don’t believe i need a baby to a validate my womanhood and simply because i hate kids.
my choices are pretty much obvious. i don’t want to grow up. i may be getting older, but i don’t have the capability to grow up.
but hey, growing up is over-rated anyway.
mid-20’s. then there’s late 20’s. then.. it’s all downhill from there.
i should’ve seen the signs.
there was me setting foot in an unfamiliar territory commonly known as the gym.
then there’s me depriving myself of carbs.
and lastly, me being the safe playing, ergo boring home buddy that i’ve become.
this wouldn’t have happened if i haven’t reached my mid-20’s.
i would’ve still been eating five cups of rice with sisig for lunch and not feeling guilty. i would’ve still been bragging to my friends that i never go to the gym and still manage to look fit. i would’ve still been feisty and ballsy on every adventure that comes my way and do things for the heck of it.
but we all need to age. it’s non-negotiable.
and frankly, im not afraid of aging. it takes more than wrinkles and menopause to scare me.
what scares me is the fact that i am getting older and i may not have a clue that i actually am.
older and wiser. it always come as one. but what if we’re just getting older but not the latter?
well it depends on how we define wiser. if wiser means playing it safe for the rest of your life and seeing things in black and white, then id rather be blissfully dumb. because life is never safe, it’s all about risks. and things are seen better in different shades and not just black and white.
i choose to live my life the way i want it, and not because it’s the norm of the society. i choose not to live my life just because it’s whats supposed to be. like i choose not to be married like the rest of the girls have been dreaming of. not because i think ill never meet the man i want to spend the rest of my life with. but because i know ill meet him (or might have already) but will never trust the sanctity of commitment. i choose not to have kids when everyone says it’s what makes a woman whole. because i don’t believe i need a baby to a validate my womanhood and simply because i hate kids.
my choices are pretty much obvious. i don’t want to grow up. i may be getting older, but i don’t have the capability to grow up.
but hey, growing up is over-rated anyway.
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